Gas Price Conspiracy Theory

*****WARNING*****There is no way any of this is true….but it might be????No way actually…but maybe???No, no, no..but?

I tend to be a bit too serious when I write. So I’ve decided to do a silly little exercise. I have been writing about something I’ll likely release before too long called ‘If They Can They Will’. It is a cynical perspective about the lack of morality among powerful people and institutions. Fun stuff, right? Anyway, in the piece I mention that I often play a game when it comes to issues of public note. In the exercise I try to think of the most depraved scheme I can that would address whatever issue is at the forefront of the public psyche. Perhaps I can start an entire series of writings called – MACTFA – Make Awesome Conspiracy Theories Fun Again.

The Gas Price Conspiracy Theory:

It is no secret that gas prices are crazy. Everyone knows it and everyone has someone to blame. Usually the blame is split along political lines – just like every other aspect of our lives, or so it seems anyway. My theory goes a little something like this.

When the Democrats have power in the executive and the legislative body they tend to try to push agendas attempting to address climate change. The Democrats currently have relative control of both houses of Congress and the presidency. These are conditions that present a potential threat to the fossil fuel companies and the price setting oil cartel OPEC (Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries).

These powerful oil producing companies and the organizations they belong to know that the US population has separated itself into warring political factions. They also know that every aspect of American life has been politicized and hence is fertile ground for manipulation. These organizations have decided to continually raise the price of fuel knowing that half of the US will blame the Democrats.

This will present an opportunity for the pro-fossil-fuel Republicans to retake control at the next election. Not that the Democrats needed too much help from the higher gas prices to bungle their positions of power. Once the Republicans take power gas prices will then come back down a bit – keep that ‘a bit’ in mind for a minute. The Republicans will not touch the concept of climate change. So the fossil fuel industry knows that they needn’t worry about any policy coming down the pike that would adversely effect their profits.

Back to that ‘a bit’ part from the last paragraph. Once the party that favors fossil fuels is back in power and controlling policy then that gas price will lower ‘a bit’, but the gas prices will not return to the level that they were before the false hike started. Instead it will come down to a price that will seem like a relief to us consumers because we had been paying so much for the past year or so, but in reality the price will be much higher than it was when the increase started.

For example, as of yesterday the average gas price in America was $4.97. That is $1.90 more than it was on that date a year ago. So let’s say that it didn’t go any higher than it currently is. Now let’s make the safe assumption that the Republicans win big and retake both houses of Congress in November. That price comes down a dollar or maybe a dollar and a half. That still leaves a 40 cent, or about a 20%, increase over a two year period, which is a significant increase in that amount of time.

So in that instance not only are the fossil fuel companies making a lot of money in the year that they spiked prices, but they’ve also been able to raise their basement rate 20% in a short time. All the while they’ve also been able to help a party that is a proponent of their industry take power. In turn that party will ensure no policy be made that will negatively impact the fossil fuel industry. To go a step further, since the Republicans will be directing policy they’ll also control most of the news cycle. In so doing they’ll be sure to use their power to quell or spin any news that may not be advantageous to the fossil fuel industry.

In the end we will be left with higher gas prices than we had before the spike, we will still be at the mercy of the fossil fuel industry, we will have a government in place that ignores the looming threat of ecological collapse, and a large portion of the population will be so happy that gas isn’t $5/gallon that they’ll just disengage again.

Accusing the fossil fuel industry and gasoline companies for price gauging to push agendas isn’t new, but this was a fun exercise. Ain’t the world grand? Actually it is grand there are just a few turds out there that are hellbent on ruining it. Let’s not let them do that.

I appreciate your attention and hope you found this somewhat entertaining.
Thanks for reading and take care of each other.